Tuesday, January 29, 2008

So nineteen...

So my birthday has come and gone.

I'm nineteen and yet I still feel the same way I did back when I turned eighteen, seventeen, sixteen, fifteen etc. like nothing has changed and like nothing will change. It's like I know I'm growing and I know I'm taking another step closer to my demise, and yet there is no impact.


Except the feeling of not wanting to grow up and can I please stay this way forever please is somewhat stronger now. I've enjoyed being a teenager and I've enjoyed the independence and the dependence of this age and I do not want to be upgraded to the age where I have to actually pay for my independence-y actions without having anyone to depend on.


Other than that, I'm older now.

Lotsa love, Jana


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