Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Where I refer people to numbers...


Something has been bothering me a lot for this past few days weeks months years. And since I don't want to offend anybody with what I'm going to say, i.e. I'm a coward who can't say it to your face, I'm going to keep the names to myself.

See recently the feeling of pain has been making several poking appearances to me, not just physically but basically emotionally too. I've had this three close friends back in high-school. Let's refer to them as #1, #2 and #3. I knew #1 and #2 before #3 met them and #1 and #2 knew #3 before I met #3. You still following there?

The thing is we became quite close us four, but I can't help feeling being the third fecking wheel and you know that kinda weird to say because we're like four. But that's the thing that I keep feeling among them. To this date they manage to talk about each other in their blogs and they have their own blog thing together and what do I have? Hey Jana! I miss you. How's #3/#1 and #2? I miss her/them a lot! Can you tell her/them that this that that this? Yeah? Ok, bye!

I mean it's annoying but it's not their fault. It's my fault for pushing myself into a friendship and expecting things they never could give me. And some people are closer to others than to others, i.e. me.

Thank God I have the Turtle.

Lotsa love, Jana

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