Saturday, February 21, 2009

DJ's and Russians

I've been listening on the radio.

And it's kinda funny when you think about it, because everybody seems to be having problems about their love-life. I mean it's never any thing other than that. Is it because it's February? I mean do they scan all problems first and then hang up on you if you have a problem with your grandparents or something?

Well, there I was listening on the radio, skipping one station after another station, searching for some decent song, and every station I come across with has some girl/guy/whatever complaining about a problem, and every problem seems to be connected and the DJ even starts to sound like the same person. Actually it's kind of freaky when you listen to it...

"I have a..."

"boyfriend and we love each other very much..."

"then he cheated on me! I couldn't believe it..."

"and so I told him I was pregnant and he so totally..."

"could not tell his parents about us..."

"and I was so happy cause I'm sure..."

"that she and I were meant to be..."

"I mean total lesbian..."

I kid you not, this happened and I was laughing my bum off. It was so funny and freaky. But you know seriously these people shouldn't really talk to DJ's about their problems because dude it's kind of annoying how they just laugh at your problems and how they just treat it as a joke. Sometimes, most of the times, it's hard to take this kind of people seriously because here you are, sharing your problems, and what do they do? They laugh at you.

I mean I wonder if people like wasting their money on phone bills, just to share their problems with a DJ who'll laugh at them.

Kinda wondering who the real idiots are.


I recently had a weird dream.

I was at a bar and I was drinking some fizzy drinks, because my parents have drilled it into my mind that drinking alcohol was baddy bad bad baddy bad for you and therefore it registers even in my dreams and so I was drinking fizzy drinks because it made sense since I would not go against my parent's desires and yet drinking too much of it is still bad for you. I think I consciously thought in the dream that it's too bad I couldn't get drunk with this drink, and that was the only thing missing from my depressing night.

And I had wanted to get freaking drunk, so I could forget something. I could forget a smile, a sweet touch, a face, a hand. I wanted to forget the wad of cash that was handed to me and I never wanted to remember the pain that was tearing at my heart.

In the dream, I was a Russian prostitute, and I just finished a "transaction".

By the way, I would just like to ask my consciousness, why did I feel like I was a Russian prostitute, when everything was happening in the Philippines and I was thinking in fluent Tagalaog? Also, why did it have to be Russian?

But it could have been German, Chinese, Malaysian, Korean, American, whatever, for all I cared in that dream, because all that mattered was I was in a bar, trying to get drunk with a carbonated beverage all because I was a weird prostitute that loved all her clients. I mean it was like when I had a client, I would love him with all my heart. But of course he would leave, because hello? I'm a prostitute, who happens to be Russian, so who would stay for a prostitute?

So I just finished a "transaction", and he left and my heart was broken into a million pieces, except I was still hoping that the next client that comes along would love me. I was thinking, "Who could love a prostitute? Who could love me?"

Then I woke up.

And I called the Turtle and I rambled on and on about how I'm scared that he might leave me and I don't think I would survive that and he said that he'll love me no matter what, even if I'm a Russian prostitute.


And I realized that I have idiotic dreams.

Lotsa love, Jana

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